The power of self-expression and the courage to be disliked

They say communication is key.

Yet we use our words so freely and often without thinking what message we are sending across. Reviews, opinions and likes take first place ahead of good old fashioned conversation. Today’s communication has taken a different form. It’s no longer face-to-face yet everyone seems to know what we are up to. That’s the power of online.

We live our lives through Facebook and Instagram. We share so much online that good conversation doesn’t stand a chance. Sadly it turns out not to be good for anyone. We feel increasingly more lonely, isolated and misunderstood. We miss true love and friendship.The huge effect today’s social media has on people’s lives is hard to avoid. Words are cheap. And so is online abuse. But is there a way we can remove the damaging effect these negative words and emotions have on our lives?

Why are young people more prone to follow trends on social media and be more affected by them?

I have recently read about Austrian philosopher Alfred Adler. Adler believes it’s not our problem if someone doesn’t like us and we have nothing to do with it. There is no point trying to change it either. The only way to be free and happy is to separate your tasks from other people tasks and focus on your own higher purpose.

And what do we gain by acting in this way? Well, with time we gain peace of mind, internal balance and freedom in the way we live our lives. The last one is certainly appealing. The cost of living our live according to somebody else’s values is very high and can have very negative effect on us long term. It’s very important to get to know yourself and understand what your highest values are.

And what do we gain by acting in this way? Well, with time we gain peace of mind, internal balance and freedom in the way we live our lives. The last one is certainly appealing. The cost of living our live according to somebody else’s values is very high and can have very negative effect on us long term. It’s very important to get to know yourself and understand what your highest values are.

What does honesty mean to you? Do you appreciate other people being honest with you?

Facebook gives us an opportunity to create a very appealing but fake fantasy world. It gives us all a chance to be perceived by others as more attractive, happier versions of ourselves. Some of us create this new world or go one step further and start believing in it. Others use Facebook purely for business purposes and don’t share any personal details with the world. I also know few people who decided to leave social media for good. The key thing is to have a balanced approach to people and life. The courage to be happy also includes the courage to be disliked.

I have recently read a fantastic book by Fumitake Koga and Ichiro Kishimi. The title is ‘’The courage to be disliked’’. I found it to be an extremely interesting, helpful and reassuring source of information. The book is about how to free yourself from the opinions of others, how to be true to yourself and find your inner balance. The effect the book has had on me was like a reassuring pat on the back. It was like a good old friend telling me that I’m doing well. I highly recommend it to everyone looking for balance, happiness or the perfect self-expression.

Honesty is a very expensive gift. Don’t expect it from cheap people.’’ – Warren Buffett

The subject of online and offline communication is a wide one and it will certainly not be exhausted in one blog post. However I do hope you found it useful. Please let me know if you did. Remember that if someone dislikes you it’s a proof that you are exercising your freedom and living in accordance with your own principles. Equally your unhappiness cannot be blamed on your past or your environment.

Most of us don’t lack competence, we are lacking the courage to be happy.

Published by lisanilson

Founder, ceo, youth mentor

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