5 simple ways of regaining control in your life

Life challenges us every day. It brings new choices, new decisions, dilemmas… As a result we evolve and change. We adapt to new conditions and learn from our experiences. Our life story is divided in years. Just like chapters in a book some years are interesting and some boring. Some bring happiness and excitement and some bring sad, unhappy news, which can set us back.

It’s our ability to adapt that defines the direction in which we are heading. Being adaptable and positive impacts how things unravel for us in the end. It’s not what happens but what you do that will make a real difference to your life. When it feels like it’s all too much to take in, it’s worth reminding yourself that it’s your life and despite what it might look like, you are in control of it. 

Here is how you regain that control

Accept things you can’t change

It takes some life experience to recognise things we can and can’t change. As much as we are able to improve our circumstances by adjusting our mindset and our attitude, we can’t change other people. Once you find this ‘’acceptance’’ you will start finding your inner balance. Getting rid of your expectations will help too. You can’t make someone love you. You are unlikely to help them unless they want to be helped. It’s much easier to focus on achieving your own goals and improving your life. If you really want your life to change, change your habits. Don’t blame or try to change others, as you wont succeed. Accept things that are out of your control.

When things get tuff, ask for help

We all have awful days. There are days when nothing goes to  plan. Reaching out to get an advise or help is not a sign of weakness but a sign of strength. A friend, business partner or a family member can give you a new, fresh perspective on things. A new pair of eyes may see things in a completely different light and offer a solution to what feels like a hopeless situation. It’s important to be open and learn from others. Knowing who and when to ask for help is a real life skill – a skill that most successful business people have mastered to perfection.

Things are never as bad as they seem

When things get really tuff; it’s always a good idea to step back and get some perspective. Change your scenery, go for a run or call a friend. Do something! Don’t sit alone and wonder when things are going to get easier. They rarely get easier on their own. It’s important to take action and focus on finding a solution, not focusing too much on the problem, as the universe will send you more of what you think about. When you step back you will be able to see things in a different light. A real life challenge might suddenly present itself as a new opportunity – one that is  worth considering. Physical exercise always helps in gaining balance as you ‘’get out your head’’ and connect with your heart. There is something positive in each situation, which brings me to the next point.

Embrace challenge and learn from it

I don’t believe in coincidence or bad luck. Every life experience, every person we meet brings something positive to our life. Usually it’s hard to see it this way at the time. The worst heartbreak is an opportunity to get to know yourself better and learn what we want and what we don’t in a relationship. A bad investment or failed business partnership could open doors to a brand new opportunity. A major work crisis might be the very reason why you set up your own business. In most cases have learned something about ourselves that we didn’t know before and that’s much better  than being in the same place in 3 years time.

Be the master of your thoughts 

Our mind is a powerful machine. It’s primary objective is to create and activate self-defence mechanism. Every day our past experiences create connections between our brain nerve cells. When we re-live the same experience these connections get stronger and quickly and subconsciously turn into thinking patterns, which generate our emotions. Our emotions create your actions and our actions create your everyday reality. Most of us trust our thoughts too much and don’t challenge them enough.

Only some of us are able to recognise when our thoughts don’t work to our advantage. That’s when your ‘’clever’’ head tries to prevent you from taking risks and making future mistakes. What we don’t realise is that the same head prevents us from growing and creating more exciting future for ourselves. Our brain wants to go back to what’s familiar even if it’s not good for us. It’s important to learn how to control your thoughts as that’s when you will control your happiness.

Life sends us on a journey that tests our strength, patience, relationships and our mental health. However, you are in control of your destiny! Love, health and wealth is inside you and all around you, you just need to invite it into your life.

Don’t let your past determine your future. 

Published by lisanilson

Founder, ceo, youth mentor

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